Party of five…..

The date was Friday 20^th October, yes we’re back to dates. So far the pregnancy had been plagued with extreme fatigue and debilitating hunger…. And I am not being dramatic. If I didn’t eat every 2 to 3 hours my body would literally starting to shut down. If I wasn’t pregnant I’d be going in to get checked for diabetes. So as result I wasn’t very keen on making the immense effort to go in for an ultrasound.

 

The first one is usually a dating one, as I saw it if it’s even two weeks out it’s not going to drastically change anything when you’re in it for life. Julie at the Dr’s office insisted I get one done, make sure everything is ok blah blah blah. So on that Friday afternoon I found myself at Chinatown Radiology, patiently waiting 45 minutes after my scheduled appointment trying not to pee myself and anxious to get back to work. They called my name and I went in, gingerly lying on the table lest I pee. 2 minutes into the ultrasound:

Him: Is this your first ultrasound?

Me: Yes.

Him: You say you’re 11 weeks along?

Me: Yes.

Him: Do twins run in your family?

Me: Yeess……….why?

Him: You’re got twins in there!

Me: You’re joking right?

Him: No, look ….

Me: Oh wow

Him: You have someone with you here right?

Me: No, it’s just me.

Him: (trying to dispel the panic) Twins are a blessing, you will have so much fun, don’t worry about it

Me: Hmmmmmm…. Ok

He was a lovely Phillipino man who proceeded to give me all sorts of reassurances. All I could think of was I hear you but…….

My first sms was to Baba saying I needed to talk to him right away, he was at work. When I spoke to him all he could say was “Wow, ok… wow, for real, ok, wow………..” (you get the picture). Gogo I called in the middle of the night her time and I imagine not much more sleep was had that night.

How did this happen you might wonder, well besides the obvious I do have twins in my family, Karl doesn’t. I did however initially think we only had 2 sets of twins, then I remembered Blondie and Mudhara in NYC and then last week Gogo reminded me of Sekuru Tafadzwa’s 2 identical 4 year-old girls. Then she asked around and they are 3 other sets of twins in the family…. there really was no escape, it just perhaps should been the first pregnancy not the second when you’re pushing 40! Oh wow, I’m pushing 40…. In any case, I digress, it’s a blessing and a journey we are all looking forward to.

Back to dates, August 6 2010 was an extremely life changing day for me. That is the day that my Gogo passed away. Contrary to Missy’s thinking she is not the only one with a Gogo. She comforted me when I had my first scraped knee after an afternoon playing on Reeler Crescent. She saved me from crying whilst the maid was pulling so hard whilst plaiting my hair and was so gentle I nearly fell asleep as she was doing it. She constantly reminded me to pray without ceasing. She always advised a young lady should have her tummy in, chest out and drink lots of water. She was love, she was kindness, she was home.

When she passed we were living in Napier, New Zealand and I was working as a Network Engineer for a computer services provider which involved going to see customers all day and delivering friendly service with a smile on my face. For two weeks, all day every day Yolanda Adams’ “I’m gonna be ready” got me through it on repeat in the car. I could smile all day and go home and cry my heart out with that song getting me through. The same song has been on my mind since I found out the twins. This is no means a tragic event but it is life altering. Just as much as I couldn’t have imagined a world in which Gogo wasn’t in even if she was a million miles away, I never imagined I would be a mother of twins.

“Sight beyond what I see
You know what’s best for me
Prepare my mind, prepare my heart
For whatever comes, I’m gone’ be ready
Strength to pass any test
I feel like I’m so blessed
With you in control, I can’t go wrong
‘Cause I always know, I’m gonna be ready”

So there you have it folks, we’re having twins. All we know for now is that they are dichorionic diamniotic (DCDA) twin pregnancy is a type of twin pregnancy where each twin has its own chorionic and amniotic sacs. This type occurs most commonly with dizygotic (fraternal) twins, but may also occur with monozygotic (identical) twin pregnancies. We are all doing well and adjusting to our new reality. We have moments of being shocked we have to buy a 7 seater car, pondering how we carry two babies (this was Missy’s dilemma), I wonder how I will breastfeed two babies and I think Baba should be more concerned about the possibility of living in a house with 4 girls!

While the adults in the house are trying to plan what to do with our BOGO (Buy One Get One Free) deal: double stroller, two car seats, two cribs, navigate existing space, more clothes, more doctors visits, which hospital, daycare or nanny; Missy has declared we need a 3 bed bunk with slide to come down and stairs to go down and that its taking a really long time for them to come……… The other good news is that Gogo is coming to help us for 5 months and after September we will be very open to any visitors who have 2 hands, if they have more even better ;-).

So come next May we will be a family of 6 Baba, Mama, Missy, twins and Fishy

 

If we go down to the woods today…

Singing in the rain….

How do you summarize the onset of verbal diarrhea, seriously, that is what is literally is. From the times her eyes open to the time she goes to sleep it’s an explosion of words complete with the most adorable facial expressions and appropriate body language. A gentle reminder that this in fact a living, breathing and most definitely thinking human being who will not be ignored, even by the most disinterested of neighbors…

She has started to go to a group daycare called CEFA 3 days a week, as you can see in the picture they wear uniform so to help with the distinction we call this ‘school’ and to Natasa’s two days a week she just going to see Baka (this is Gogo in Serbian and also what Gagi calls her) and play with Gagi. She took a while to settle in. Nearly 3 months to be exact. She wasn’t unhappy but neither was she happy. She was polite, did everything she was asked to do, she ate what she could stomach (and proceed to act like a hungry street kid when we picked her up), she got by with minimal effort. We have come to the conclusion she was just observing the situation, figuring out where she fit and if these people knew what they were doing (they were going through a staffing change so a few substitute teachers came and went but the main teacher remained the same). They thought she was a model citizen and they were ‘waiting for her voice to come out’. Then her highness settled in and began to exercise said voice and say no! That was when I knew she was now comfortable and happy. LOL!

Chilling like a boss

She loves to go to school though and play with all her friends who she quite happily enquires as to whether they too are being forced to sleep at night by their dictatorial mothers. “Where’s … Raazik?”, “At his house, sleeping”. Where’s…. Isabelle?”, “At her house sleeping. “Where’s … Kaysan?”, “At his house sleeping” and so it goes on until we have named Nadia, Semra, Jai, Cameron, Nyssa (Anyssa), Amber, Krish, Cory and Nika (Annika). I am sure you can see where this is going, we also tend to be very very hungry at bedtime and we might also need to go pee pee or enquire as to whether is cloudy, raining, sunny, snowing, dark or windy. We however learnt that when it’s time no talking, no crying, just sleep which she repeats a few times to check just in case the rules have changed.

The most important event surrounding school though is the train. We take the train to school and we have 2 stops which take 5 minutes and then another 5 to 7 minutes to walk to the daycare, as long as she’s in the stroller, if she decides to walk well… I am sure you can imagine. The Skytrain system has two types of trains. The older ones are white and the newer ones are a grey/blue/black color combination. To Missy they are black. She only wants to go on the black train and she has been known to scream bloody murder if she is made to go on a white train. The trouble is that sometimes you can wait for 8 or even 10 trains before a black one come along. Oh boy, it’s painful, more so on chilly windy mornings. She’s happy bundled in the stroller, me .. not so much. I am less patient since I need to be at work by 9am, Baba can take his time cause it’s usually his day off when he takes so, so as a result she’d rather go with him because he’s willing to wait for the black train.

Snow eating Mt Seymour

We also truly began potty training a month ago and it’s been going very well, one or two accidents a week but that’s all so far. I know…. On hindsight now I can see some of your faces when at 8 months I said I would slowly start it. I abandoned that once she started to use the potty as her TV watching platform whilst she was fully clothed! She’s good at telling you when she needs to go and now she only has a pull-up diaper at night. Over the weekend we had just had breakfast and we were skyping Gogo when she started to run to the toilet saying I need to do poo, I started to run behind her and then she turned back around, ran to her books and was yelling “Book, book Mama, duck book”, “Really is this your priority right now, reading, I thought you wanted to poo?”. Then I can only imagine out of desperation she grabs a book and runs back to the toilet, I help her on and she says “close door mama…please..” and she proceeds to do her business and read the book out loud! Hmmmmm, I think I missed the memo, when did this start…. LOL! Now it’s standard procedure.

 

Going Shopping

Missy likes to help us cook and clean up. For Christmas, Baka gave her a set of pots, pans and utensils that she has ‘picnics’ with and she cooks her pasta and chickpeas. She cautions us that ‘it is hot and no touch mama’. Then we have to sit down and let her mix then we can try some. She is also dying to go to the beach and I keep telling her she has to wait until it’s sunny and warmer…. She keeps agreeing but I am not sure we’re on the same page because two days later I get the same question. Her birthday is also always tomorrow and she’s guaranteed to have a party and lots of presents.

I took her to a Goodnoise Gospel Choir concert on Sunday, 5 minutes in she complained it was too loud and she proceeded to start singing Happy Birthday Baba just went the solo was going into a beautiful rendition of ‘Oh Happy Day’, you know at the beginning when the music is melodic and soft…Missy starts her own song,clapping as she jumps on the pew… Popular music is not her thing by any stretch of the imagination. If you play the radio in the car or at home, play my own music I get ‘Turn it off mama!’, she can tolerate her father’s reggae, namely ‘One Step Forward’ by Max Romeo, I think mostly because of the actions that go with it. The clear winner is Classical Music, that is the only music that doesn’t get dismissed or deemed as too loud. It started off with The Very Hungry Caterpillar on Netflix. The program is accompanied by what I think is very average imagery and animation and classical music, Missy loves the book and the music seems to literally make her heart sing.

On a final note the main way I get her to do what she would rather not do now is say “Missy I am going to count to 5 then you have to do…” Now she’s taken to pre-empting it and just saying “Count to 5 Mama”….. clever little girl…

Be kind to one another people, stay blessed.

Lunar Festival Year of the Monkey

When enough is enough

Art is Smart

This post on a couple of events that happened August 15^th and August 24^th 2015!

I wrote them down in September and then I meant to post them and well now’s it’s February… Go figure….. But I am on a roll now I think. More to come, in the meantime pretend it’s August 2015….

First and foremost Malaika now officially has a nickname which she has wholly embraced. It really began a few days after she was born. Gogo would send messages asking after Missy. She has been referred to as such on and off and I didn’t realize was that this is what they were mostly calling her at daycare. In the last few weeks she refers to herself as Missy, so much so that if you call her Malaika you seldom get a response. So if you need a response: call her Missy.

So anyway Missy and Gagi have become best friends. Gagi is Natasa’s grandson, his given name is Mateo. They have been spending many days together and now request each other’s presence sometimes as soon as their eyes open in the morning. Natasa and Malaika were making a cake for Gagi’s birthday party the following day. They had co-operatively made the cake together and when it came to tidying up Natasa told Missy that she couldn’t help with that part. She was to step aside, sit down and have a snack whilst she tidies up. Missy did not take too kindly to this dismissal. She wasn’t happy but she didn’t kick and fuss nor throw a tantrum instead she headed to the entrance way, picked up her backpack, went to door and started knocking. She wanted to be let out; she wanted to let Natasa know that she had options and didn’t have to put up with such treatment! Enough was enough! I wish I could have been a fly on the wall. It took some time and lots of apologies but she came around eventually and put down her backpack. I am sure is she could have articulated it she was would have said “Don’t do that again, he’s my friend after all!”

Happy Birthday Baba

The next incident was on her father’s birthday. We were going to have dinner with Uncle Matt and Aunt Andrea. We got home and I decided to make her a pizza to nibble on since we were still waiting for Baba to get home and we would then drive to their house. I was trying to act as quickly as I could before the native revolted, overtaken by hunger. Missy asked for juice, she had been into the storage room and there was none, she looked in the fridge and also came up empty. Missy, it’s all gone, we will have to ask Baba to buy some more when he gets home. She nodded in agreement and walked away, well that was a fairly good outcome I thought to myself as I carried on in the kitchen. Next thing I hear is ‘Door! Door! Door!’ ‘Malaika urikuda kuenda kupi (where do you want to go)?”. No response except more requests for ‘Door!’ I was trying to get things going so I ignored the requests that were now turning into screams and tears. I just managed to put the pizza in the oven and then went to the door, after more prodding I opened the door to see where it would lead. She went out and straight to the elevator then asked “Where Baba?”, “Ummm, Baba varikubasa, vanodzoka manje manje” (He’s at work he’ll be back just now), “Oh”. She then plonks herself in front of the elevator and won’t move… “Missy, handei mumba” (Let’s go in the house). “Baba, juice” and that was that. So we sat outside the elevator and waited. A couple of neighbors came out and gave us some strange looks sitting barefoot, right outside the elevator, singing nursery rhymes… By the time Baba got home juice was long forgotten and she was just happy to see him!

A lot more words, phrases and character traits are coming through thick and fast. She can count to 10 and not just parroting off she can recognize the numbers and go forward or back depending on how she’s feeling. She just started saying most colors when she sees them, red seems to still elude her tongue. The tantrums are still pretty tame (famous last words) though she seems to have her stubborn stare-down well-rehearsed, it’s a pleasant stare down which is reserved for me when I am denying her some basic human right, it often eventually breaks into a smile or a silly face!

This is going to be an amazing ride….. let’s hope I keep remembering to share it with you…

Peekaboo

The princess is here: a day in the life of a strong-willed toddler.

Princess and her crown

Where do I begin, essentially her words have arrived and this has empowered her to well and truly establish her reign over her subjects. She can now also open and close doors by herself so she has no real need for us save for the bare necessities of life!

On, Monday, daycare was closed so Malaika had the pleasure of spending the day with Mammi (I am still quite annoyed she’s chosen to reject calling me Mama unless she wants to sugar coat her request). I am going to digress here a little. We both do our best to speak to her in Shona, tell her the Shona equivalent of things but it is easier said than done. Much to our disappointment her first words have been English ones, perhaps we are fully to blame, perhaps we are not. We’ll see how her language develops. It has made us more determined to Shona-fy her! Anyway back to our day. We started off at the library, it was story-time, a session she used to love to take part in, that was until she paid more attention to the fact there are unmaned computers outside the story-time area. I even switched off the screen before she got to it but she adamantly sat at the blank screen and banged away at the keyboard for a good chunk of time, enthusiastically forcing a kiss on me and saying bye-bye so I could leave her be. This happens a lot lately and she did it twice later on in the day, once when she wanted to hang out in her room with the door closed (turns out she has the runs, I guess no one wants to share those moments either) and another time when she was ‘on-the-phone’ with a toy car. She’s not even a teenager yet and she wants to be left alone! Anyway after the keyboard had no life left in it and she briefly bound up the stairs and then discovered other toddlers players with lego, dinosaurs and trains. This could be fun you’re thinking, until a little boy didn’t want to share his train, she grabbed it from him, he took it back, she sulked, he gave it back and he wanted him back and she smacked him! He was clearly close to melting point anyway because he cried so much he began to heave and his mother took him home….

Sunny day in the play park

We then made our way to the baby area where is a rather popular kitchen, she didn’t want to share the kitchen with another little girl who got there first, that produced a few tears and when she moved on to some books another girl wanted to read with her and she would have none of it. I told her she wouldn’t make any friends if she didn’t learn to be more friendly to which a lady produced commented “well she’s pretty enough not to have to worry about making friends!”. Really? Wow, I was at a loss, all I could say was you can’t get by on just your looks, she clearly begged to differ. After these ‘words of wisdom’ we went to watch free CBC outdoor #musicalnooners concert before going home for lunch and a nap! The rest of the afternoon included a brief bike lesson, a meltdown at WholeFoods over chips, a reading and singing session followed by dinner over Pepper Pig for her whilst I dreamed of a large glass of wine!

This was also  the first day she has been able to properly open and close a door with no hesitation. Her world is now suddenly filled with all these possibilities. The prime one being, if she doesn’t want to sleep she can just get up, open the door and be on her way to more interesting things. It used to be for many months after dinner we would brush our teeth, hop into bed, read a book or two, sing a rhyme, whisper a lullaby, have a few sips of tea, kiss and hug goodnight, I would say ‘goodnight I love you, see you tomorrow’, she would nod and wave, I would close the door and that was it until the morning. Sometimes she would stall and ask for ‘pee pee’ or ‘num num’ (food) but that was all, now she can let you leave, think you’re out of the woods, settle in for some telly and dessert and then you see this little face in the shadow, slowly creeping towards you saying ‘Mamma……what’s this?’ Before you know it, it’s been 4 attempts, your ice-cream is melted, it’s midnight and you haven’t the energy to catch up on Being Mary Jane. It’s like this all week…as my mum reminded me ‘Some mothers do have them!’

Eating chibage

We have some new words and phrases, No is still ranking at number one followed by ‘What’s this’ , ‘What is this’ (this is for when you reply incorrectly and she needs you to get it right, emphasis on the IS) , ‘Who’s this’, ‘All done’ (this generally signals the end of whatever you or she is doing), ‘Bye-bye see you’ (a must at the end of every elevator ride, screamed louder if the occupants do not respond the first time) and ‘Oh no..’. Then we have more new words book, phone, shiri (bird), car, choochoo (train). There are many more and she’s learning and asking the words for things all the time.  When she masters a new word she has to keep repeating it over and over again until you just about lose your mind. It’s hard to be stern with her, we really have to work at it. It’s funny the things you remember but I remember my mother I think either trying to shout or hit me and then she burst out laughing instead. I have been doing this at least twice a day the last week and a half I have been spending all day with her. That face looks at your and you can’t keep a straight face!

Today we are going to try uniforms for daycare and then we are off to the lake house with Uncle Matty for 4 days! A much needed break.

Have a great weekend everyone, stay curious…

I believe I can fly

p.s. we have moved on from chicken skin , we now eat the whole wing and munch on the bones…

The Skin-eater

With baby in her ‘office’

Miss Malaika is now 20 months old; 4 months shy of 2 years old! Wow, time really does fly. It’s taken me 2 weeks to actually complete this blog post; I had to change her age from 19 months. Somehow I thought at this stage I would have more time, I don’t know why… there’s no harm in dreaming.

Our child is still a picky eater and despite both of us swearing she must weigh 10kg/22pounds she’s not quite there yet. She may get there soon though because she’s taken to eating chicken skin, yes my child is a skin eater! The pediatrician said she needs to eat lots of fat and protein, she was listening and she took it to heart. How did we figure this out you ask? It started with chicken wings, she wanted to gnaw at the bone so I gave a whole one to work on, she only ate the skin, usually with meat she chews it for an age then hands it to me to dispose of. So I gave her more skin and she just kept eating. We had reached a stage where I would buy a whole chicken, roast half of it and she’d eat the whole lot in one sitting, as disgusting as it is for us to watch she’s in heaven,

Please sir, I want some more…

she keeps asking for more, more, more, complete with the hand action.

We can’t eat the chicken meat as quickly as she does the skin, luckily enough the nice lady at Whole Foods meat department has agreed to keep me the skins once a week instead of throwing them out! So there you have it, she eats crispy roast organic chicken skin free of anti-biotics and all the bad stuff. She is an African for sure her go-to foods are: mealie-meal porridge with her Grandmother’s homemade peanut butter, sadza, biltong (salt content makes me cringe but it’s protein), popcorn (maputi), rooibos tea (yes she still doesn’t drink milk or juice, just tea and water, sophisticated toddler some would say).

 

Sleeping her big bed now

She has also started swimming lessons at Aquaventures; it’s a joy to watch her take to the water more and more each week. She can stay under water for a few seconds and wants to do the routines, one more time over and over again. Now she wants to walk around the house in her swim diaper and swimming cap, what else would you on a hot summer evening! With any luck she’ll teach her mum how to swim. Seriously I should learn, I may need to save her one day… my one day should come sooner rather than later.

 

The most popular word is NO. I am sure this is the case in most households with toddlers. Is it an indication of what everyone is always saying to them? Perhaps… Once they learn it , it’s not easily un-learnt, in our house it’s been upgraded, now instead of no we get ‘No waaaayyy’, accompanied with a head shake that has a slight shoulder shuffle… oh dear, we’re in trouble now. Her vocabulary is increasing though some things are just blanket words, in Zimbabwe every soft drink is coke and for Malaika every liquid, even the sea, is tea and most foods are sadza. Also much to my dismay every older white man is Unko a.k.a Uncle, serves us right for trying to teach her to respect her parents friends! Ha ha ha! For some reason Auntie hasn’t caught on as well. She can definitely say Harro or Hi (the former seems reserved for when she’s ‘on the phone’ with the remote, fridge magnet or anything else she thinks can pass for a phone). She also always says ‘Bye bye see you’ when we leave the elevator much to the amusement of people in our building.

 

All dressed up in Portland

She reads lot of books, or puk-puk as she calls them. She has to read during breakfast and when she’s on the toilet sometimes. Point of correction when I say read I mean: I read and she points and grunts! Occasionally she’s say the words or things she recognizes or go ‘oh-wooowww…..’ at something she deems amazing. What I find interesting is that she can always tell when a book is upside down and she goes to great lengths to put it the right way up. She’s been doing it for as long as she’s shown in interest in books from about 10 months old when she was painstakingly crawling to get to them and trying to flip the pages.

 

I didn’t think much of my request that Baba should pass by IKEA and get a few things one of which was a step for the bathroom. She’s getting too heavy to carry whilst we go through the bedtime teeth brushing routine: first I rub them with a cloth, then she ‘brushes’ whilst I brush, then we both rinse and wipe clean the sink. I made the mistake of introducing the step just before bedtime last night, wow, she was soo excited and then she didn’t want to step down. It took 15 minutes to eventually drag her away kicking and screaming. Then she took an age to actually fall asleep, she was too wound up to sleep. I firmly believe she dreamt about all the things she can now do 5 inches taller….Now she carts the step all over the house trying to see what she’s been missing out on and she quite figured out she can use it to reach all those things we’ve trying to keep out of her reach….

So the grass is singing and summer is here! We are already starting to be able to wear shorts, turning on the fan to cool down and missy has learnt that she can say ‘ice biz’ (please) pointing to the freezer with a little bowl in her hands, ice will appear and she can happy suck away at it. Of course she’s not doing this for the purposes of ‘cooling down’ it’s just a kids-ice-thing!

p.s. No more breastfeeding, stopped at 17 months when I went to LA to meet Auntie Nove for a few days, came back and it had dried up! Whoop whoop! Seriously, it was a relief…

Games on the iPhone, friend or foe?

Malaika Fierce

Oh christmas tree

Towards the end of last year Natasa was quite sick. For a month we juggled looking after Malaika as she couldn’t go to daycare. The other family found a place for their son in a group daycare so when Natasa was better Malaika went back to daycare on her own.

Natasa has a grandson Mateo who is about Malaika’s age. At least twice a week either they go over to Richmond to spend the day playing or he comes downtown with his mother. They’ve become great friends. Natasa says they play and interact in a way she doesn’t often kids that age do.

Yesterday they went to a playground. There were hardly any kids around which is good because they can have free reign of the place. After a little while an older boy came over to hang around. Mateo was playing with a ball. Malaika was a little ways away doing her own thing. The boy came over and took Mateo’s ball. Mateo didn’t resist. He didn’t kick & scream or attempt to get the ball back but he clearly wasn’t happy about it, he was a little sad as his grandma put it. Malaika came over , stood in front of the boy , took the ball back and have it to Mateo. And that ladies & gentlemen is what friends are for.

Wish I could have been there…. Considering Malaika is quite small for her age that’s pretty brave. I am soo proud of her.

Here’s wishing your New Year is brave, strong, courageous and in the spirit of friendship & standing up for what you believe in and those you love.

Have a blessed week

p.s. apparently we like cooking

What’s cooking good looking

 

 

All I want for christmas is…. rice cakes

Onesie

Last night Malaika ate her dinner, by herself from start to finish. This is not from lack of trying on her part but usually I intervene because I feel she’s taking too long and I want to take advantage of a good run before she loses interest. Last night her highness wasn’t having it, she took hold of that fork and she wasn’t letting it go for anyone. She brought the plate closer to her chest with one hand to avoid spillage, Gogo Parktown would be proud, she’d say “arikushandisa munyati” (she’s using her brain). She ploughed through her rice, occasionally picked up some chicken breast , checked it for what I can only imagine is poison given the suspicious look on her face, gobbled it up, pick up the fork and nibbled on more rice. Once she had eaten most of it and what was left was a little too fiddley for her chunky cutlery to navigate she used her fingers to literally pick up and eat every last grain. If I didn’t know better I would check for signs of kwashiorkor, poor child must be starved! Thank you @biglousbutcher , my daughter has only been eating meat in the form of mince or disguised in whatever she’s eating. Whilst she was eating her rice she would occasionally take a few sips of her tea and wash down her gourmet meal.

Let me elaborate on the tea drinking. She still doesn’t drink milk. With all dairy products except for butter she simply smells them and turns away in mild disdain. If it makes it into her mouth she swallows it but puts her hand up ever so emphatically and that is the end of that. We have decided she’s lactose intolerant and her body is telling her to stay away from it. As a result she will be breastfed until she starts to eat enough calcium-rich foods that we won’t be at risk of having a osteoporotic toddler! At any rate what she does drink a lot of is water and rooibos tea. The tea is Rooibos Cape Town from @TheTeaPlace1, infused with lovely flowers and fruit , no sugar, just tea. She doesn’t like juice or any other liquid really. Her Auntie Cher thinks she’s sophisticated, her friend Malaika (what are the chances there’s two of them in Vancouver?) who is 4 thinks it’s just silly, I tend to agree.

After our meal she took great pleasure in helping me sweep up the bits of rice that didn’t make it into her mouth, even holding up the dust pan, it was going really well until she started to pick the rice from the dust pan and eating them! A lesson in domestic hygiene is sorely needed…

Tidy up time

As you may have gathered she’s running around now. Talking a mile a minute complete with hand actions too. The main problem is she still doesn’t say things we understand so we pretend to have a conversation, totally agree, act appropriately chagrined on her behalf and most of the time seem to get it right. Occasionally we don’t and she looks at you as if to say ‘That’s totally not what I am saying!” Her strong will continues to shine through, my only hope is that she learns to be flexible and admit when she’s wrong, something my mother wisely says is up to us all to teach and guide her through. Here’s a funny picture, on the day in question it was -2 degrees out, we were going to an Eco Fashion Vintage Pop-up Shop. It wasn’t raining, she’d newly discovered her love of umbrellas. She insisted to she hold the umbrella all the way out of our building and  on the 10 minute walk to the pop-up shop. Thank goodness this phase only lasted a day or two. It’s tricky to navigate a stroller downtown, around lots of other pedestrians whilst trying to help her keep up the umbrella. And of course something would catch her eye and she’s simply let the umbrella go then look at me in annoyance when it hit the ground, huh.. duh…..

RainCouver

Favorites snacks at the moment are LoveChild Organics pat-a-cakes (rice crackers) and toodle-o’s (which are essentially cheerios without the sugar and packed full of goodness) , all sweetened with fruit which is good not only because it’s better for her BUT mainly because she still doesn’t seem to like sweet things. No complaints here at all! Thank you @lc_organics.

We’ve also done a photoshoot for a local kids store : Parade Baby ! Now who wouldn’t want to buy from her? She’d sell ice to an inuit no doubt…

 

Drop Everything

Count your blessings name them one by one

Haircut

A weekly post seems more and more difficult as the back to work routine gets established but once Malaika is in daycare, visitors have gone and we both have a more predictable routine then it may very well happen but for now, posts will come as and when I get a free minute (literally).

So I have been back to work for two weeks now. As the title says I am counting my blessings and naming them one by one because it is hard to believe how smooth the transition has been. My boss and colleagues have been beyond understanding and I am very thankful that I work for an organisation that actively promotes a healthy work-life balance. I have started to go to the chiropractor to fix my ailing body (apparently my spine is straight and neck is so far forward my body feels like my head weighs 25 pounds (11 kgs). I have been going three times a week, before I go to work so I get up put her porridge on, shower, go to chiro, pass by the supermarket if needs be, come back home, breastfeed the princess and then dash to work, most times I am only into the office after 9, sometimes more like 9:30. But on the positive side she’s been happily waving goodbye when I leave and then the second I walk in she breastfeeds, then clings to me for a good hour before I am allowed to put her down, let alone out of my sight. She’s been doing great hanging out with Baba, Mbuya and Sekuru. Her eating has been less than ideal but she eats when she’s hungry which apparently these days is not that often… Breakfast and dinner are good, the rest of the day she just nibbles. The fan favourites are sourdough bread and a fruit puree recipe that I got from Auntie Ethel that has raspberries, blackberries and pears. I pour it into re-usable pouches and she happily sucks away at it! She refuses to drink cow or goat milk, just even smelling them she turns away and raises her hand in protest, she’s not having it. I made a vain attempt at trying to give her formula too, it didn’t even get a lick in, she just smelt it and turned away. I am going to pump whilst I am at work and see if she’ll drink that. If not, c’est la vie, she’s missed the boat and it may be time for weaning.

Dinner has been a consistently good meal and the trick we have discovered is variety and eating together. If we all sit and eat, she’ll eat off everyone’s plate and eat way more than she would of her own food in her own plate. So as a result she eats what we eat, so that means very little salt in all food, not a welcome nor easy feat in a Zimbabwean household but its working so far.

Potty training is going as well as can be expected at this stage. We put her on the potty when she wakes in the morning and from her naps, sometimes she goes, sometimes she doesn’t. The other day I got a number one and two! It felt like Christmas! I happily snapped away and Whatsapp-ed them to a few people, much to Auntie Nove’s disgust, “OMG you’re one of those mom’s”, she says, “Hang on, you’re a nurse, thought you could handle it”, to which she cheekily replied, “You ain’t paying me” hmmm….., fair enough ~

Malaika has started to stand on her own with the confidence and speed of one just about to break into a run! She stands up, proudly pumps her chest out and coasts away like an avid surfer, when she falls she claps enthusiastically to our happy chant “Amira mira nhanha , amira mira! ” Literally translated it’s “baby is standing, standing”. It won’t be long now and she’ll be walking, then the fun will begin. As my mum pointed out life will totally slow down cause she’ll want to walk everywhere, and with her level of curiosity she’ll stop every 5 seconds to look, inspect and giggle at everything and we’ll never get anywhere fast again …joy..

She also got her first haircut thanks to Auntie Yani Pacific Hair @PacifichairV . So now she looks like a pretty boy! LOL! It actually makes her look so much more mature, no baby face. It’s cute, we all like it. So no need for anymore outcries, she no longer looks like Blue Ivy, though there was nothing wrong with it in the first place, it was just quite uneven. So no, it won’t be getting combed much, but it’ll be more even.

As parents go, we couldn’t be prouder and in the words of the late Robin Williams:

“Everyone has these two visions when they hold their child for the first time. The first is your child as an adult saying ‘I want to thank the Nobel Committee for this award.’ The other is ‘You want (yam) fries with that?'” (they are healthier for you..kkkkkkk)

Walking on sunshine

A thousand apologies for the delayed post. It’s been soo busy I don’t know if I am Arthur or Martha, feels like I am trying to be both!

Summer Dress

So what’s been happening the last two weeks..where to begin?

Mai Nove and Nove arrived for their week-long visit much to Missy’s delight! All these people doting on her, she didn’t know where to turn. We had an amazing week filled out loud conversations, laughter and soo much love. I often found her looking at me in curiosity because she was hearing me speak and laugh in ways I haven’t done before. There is a certain tone and character your voice takes on when you speak in your native tongue and laugh with women that you just simply wouldn’t otherwise do. I also feel the constant chatter has helped her speak more too, now she’s just babbling and squealing all the time, pity we don’t know what she’s saying, she probably thinks it’s quite rude that no one is responding to her requests!

It was sad to them go but we didn’t have much time to dote on it because on the same day they left we, the girls, went to San Francisco for a few days to visit Jakob, Auntie Ethel and Uncle Ian. First plane ride and she did so well. The flight was about two and a half hours. She slept the whole way there because she had missed her nap in the morning. She was shattered, the excitement of all the people at the airport, the security check and the bright airport lights are enough to take it out of even the most determined of babies. This worked out just fine for me, I was able to read my Essence magazines on my iPad for the first time in months whilst she slept. On a side note, and I fully take responsibility for not having researched this before, I didn’t get a seat belt extender for her on the flight much to my surprise. I asked and the United Airlines air hostess gave me a blank look and said ‘Just hold her’, hmmmmm.  I was shocked that you are expected to just hold the baby in your arms and I guess in case of turbulence or worse, hope for the best. In Australasia you get seat belt extensions for babies but according to the FAA in a rare emergency they are dangerous for the child, in forward impact, the adult would crush the child. You can purchase approved lap belts that you can use during the flight but not at takeoff and landing. So there you have it, it’s best to buy your baby a seat and pop them in an approved car seat if you have safety concerns.

Anyway I digress, San Fran was great! I got some time-out from the usual day-to-day routine, we walked in a different park and had fun hanging out with our San Fran whanau (family in Maori). Jakob (17 months) however took a little while each day to warm to this little baby who was suddenly getting all the attention of his parents and these other two women who kept bringing the baby back, day after day! “Jakob say hello to the baby, did you see the baby Jakob?”, on and on it went on everyday. Oh the humanity… LOL! But it only took him a few minutes to enjoy hanging with his little cousin, they had a few special moments which made us all go ‘ahhhh…..’.

So now we are back and its been hot hot hot and humid in Vancouver. Temperatures the last few days have been in the thirties, not so pleasant when you are in a non-air conditioned apartment trying to keep a baby comfortable enough to sleep. We are north-east facing and we get both morning and evening sun. Nice in winter, a challenge in summer. Her sleep was already disturbed by the visitors, the traveling (though we are in the same timezone as San Francisco), now the heat. If it’s not one thing it’s another, the dreaded sleep dilemma rears its ugly head.. We’ll get there.

We have also been recalled to shoot a dance scene for the commercial! This time, thank goodness it’ll be during the day though it could potentially take 6 hours. We are only doing a scene with her so the delays shouldn’t be too bad. Once we have a link to the finished product we’ll post it. This is the last chance to do any of this before I go back to work so we’ll make the most of it.

The big news this week is that Ambuya and Sekuru (Karl’s parents) are coming! Yayyy! Visas approved, plane tickets purchased, it’s all go! So she’ll get to spend August with Baba at home and her grandparents. She’ll be way too blessed to the stressed for sure.

We’ve started to go to the library which she loves because of the open long aisles that she can crawl to her heart’s content. Stop, flay her arms and giggle at anyone who glances in her direction. She’s very social and alert, something which may prove to be an added challenge as time goes on. We have also been going to the pool, especially in this heat, she loves it especially since they is always one or two other babies or toddlers there to play with.

Crawling

On the developmental side we have four teeth and it seems more coming as the drooling is once again freely flowing. She also kind of doing this half-crawl – half walk thing with one leg dragging on the ground and the other her knee up and bum in the air! It’s hilarious. In Malaika’s mind she can walk. She already pulling herself up and letting go, if her hands are free she’ll attempt to brace herself, if she’s got something in her hands then she’ll just fall, and why not, there’s always someone’s hands ready to break her fall! So you can imagine my days are being spent hovering around making sure that its ‘safe’ to fall otherwise having to catch her in time before she cracks her head open!

So there you have it! The summer magic continues, watch this space….

Lights, camera, action: She doesn’t know she’s not supposed to be great

It’s been a busy couple of weeks and I am going to do my best to report back on some things.

First of all we didn’t win the blogging competition, the honor went to Tamara Goyette, click here to read her blog on Discovering Parenthood. I did however have a great night out that ended at the respectable hour of 10pm (I was shattered!). It was a fun evening of wine, chocolate, fashion and lots of laughs. I meant some amazing like-minded women and hope to keep in touch with some of them. Also got to do some shopping and generally let loose. Came home to Malaika sound asleep, took my time having my late dinner and watching a bit of telly, then she woke up! She must’ve smelt me!

Vancouver Top 30 Mom Bloggers Party

Second report, GOGO IS HERE! Yay, to say that its been great is an understatement. Feeling very blessed and very happy the last few days. Malaika was a little cautious when she first met Gogo. She arrived at 7pm so by the time we got home from the airport, Malaika was really only open to boob and bed. But they did still have a special moment which cannot be captured nor described. All I can say is that it was heart-melting. By the next morning Malaika was already crying when Gogo was walking away! Now when she wakes at 7 in the morning, I take her into Gogo’s bedroom and they hang out for  a bit whilst I get some things done. Gogo can you stay… I could get used to this for sure. Pics to follow, watch this space…

The biggest news this week is that she was cast for a commercial! I know…. cool right?! It all happened rather suddenly last Thursday and its been crazy ever since. A few weeks ago I e-mailed Talent Agent Extraordinaire Pamela Wise and I had asked her about doing photography stuff for Malaika. She asked for pictures but hadn’t gotten round to it yet. Anyway she recommended Malaika to this agent who e-mailed me Thursday afternoon. The audition was that day and  just worked because it was between 4pm & 5pm, so after her afternoon nap. It was also lucky because it was actually a call back audition so she didn’t have to go through the hoops! She was cranky because I hadn’t fed her after she woke up and it took ages on the bus. There has been a shooting somewhere, traffic where the bus was coming from was bad, we waited a good 30 minutes then it was another 20 minutes to get there. Then the guy , Steve, who she was auditioning with took it upon himself to ‘introduce’ himself and get in her space, this did not go down well. She cried and it went downhill from there. Anyway, we had the audition and I was sure she’d bombed it! But she got the part! Funny…

So typical mother, I was worried about naps because they said it would be three days of shooting. My fears have been laid to rest. They called me on Saturday to find out her nap schedule, see how they can fit it into the filming. Turns out her  part needs to be shot at night so we are working through that too, she’s only needed once. They are very considerate of her sleeping, I guess we all know a tired baby is a cranky baby.We had a wardrobe session at the Shangri-La yesterday, she was a real star interacting with everyone, smiling, waving, squealing, they all loved her, she’s a real crowd pleaser… as soon we leave she starts to cry on the walk home, if we told the wardrobe people that’s what had happened they’d say we were lying she’s such a happy baby…hmmm.. The good thing is that she has a backup, yes you read correctly, they cast two babies, she’s the main one but just in case she’s having an off day, they have a spare, LOL! Anyway, it’s a Money Supermarket advert that will run in the UK and Ireland. She’ll be earning her keep before we know it! For now all her income will go into her College/University Fund.

I read an article in Essence magazine where they interviewed music legend Prince and he said one thing about kids is that they are ‘too young to not consider the fact that they can’t do something’, they don’t know they are not supposed to be great. I wish that for my angel and I hope it propels her to greatness.

Feet, hands, it’s all the same to her